– “Estoy saliendo de la ciudad, estaré allí en quince minutos…
En realidad, parece más como seis días…
No, espera, serán treinta segundos.”

El autor del cuadro de diálogo de copia de archivos de Windows va a visitar algunos amigos.

Via XKCD, por supuesto.

Anton Olsen compiló en Wired una lista de las 100 habilidades esenciales que debe tener un geek. Obviamente no es completa, pero es una aproximación interesante.

Esto va a terminar siendo un Meme. A ver cuantos años de tratamiento me harían falta para volver a la normalidad…

1. Properly secure a wireless router. Check
2. Crack the WEP key on a wireless router. Nope. Todavía no me hizo falta, todo el mundo usa wifi abierta.
3. Leech Wifi from your neighbor. Check
4. Screw with Wifi leeches. Check
5. Setup and use a VPN. Check
6. Work from home or a coffee shop as effectively as you do at the office. Check
7. Wire your own home with Ethernet cable. Check
8. Turn a web camera into security camera. Check
9. Use your 3G phone as a Wi-Fi access point. Check
10. Understand what “There’s no Place Like 127.0.0.1” means. Check
11. Identify key-loggers. Check
12. Properly connect a TV, Tivo, XBox, Wii, and Apple TV so they all work together with the one remote. Nope, demasiados aparatos que no tengo.
13. Program a universal remote. Check, más el de la tarjeta de tv en linux.
14. Swap out the battery on your iPod/iPhone. Nope, tengo iNothing.
15. Benchmark Your Computer. Check
16. Identify all computer components on sight. Check
17. Know which parts to order from NewEgg.com, and how to assemble them into a working PC. Check
18. Troubleshoot any computer/gadget problem, over the phone. Check
19. Use any piece of technology intuitively, without instruction or prior knowledge. Check
20. How to irrecoverably protect data. Yo diría, destruir datos en forma irrecuperable… Check
21. Recover data from a dead hard drive. Check, incluso viendo girar en vivo los platos.
22. Share a printer between a Mac and a PC on a network. Nope, no Mac.
23. Install a Linux distribution. (Hint: Ubuntu 9.04 is easier than installing Windows). Check
24. Remove a virus from a computer. Check
25. Dual (or more) boot a computer. Check
26. Boot a computer off a thumb drive. Check
27. Boot a computer off a network drive. Check, y varias a la vez con PXE.
28. Replace or repair a laptop keyboard. Nope, y espero que no en el corto plazo.
29. Run more than two monitors on a single computer. Nope, máximo dos en el desktop.
30. Successfully disassemble and reassemble a laptop. Nope, y espero que no haga falta.
31. Know at least 10 software easter eggs off the top of your head. Nope, llego a contar cuatro.
32. Bypass a computer password on all major operating systems. Windows, Mac, Linux. Nope, no he intentado en Mac.
33. Carrying a computer cleaning arsenal on your USB drive. Check
34. Bypass content filters on public computers. Check
35. Protect your privacy when using a public computer. Check
36. Surf the web anonymously from home. Check
37. Buy a domain, configure bind, apache, MySQL, php, and WordPress without Googling a how-to. Nope, aún no me decido por el dominio.
38. Basic *nix command shell knowledge with the ability to edit and save a file with vi. Check
39. Create a web site using vi. Check
40. Transcode a DVD to play on a portable device. Check
41. Hide a file in an image using steganography. Check
42. Knowing the answer to life, the universe and everything. Nope
43. Share a single keyboard and mouse between multiple computers without a KVM switch. Check
44. Google obscure facts in under 3 searches. Bonus point if you can use I Feel Lucky. Check
45. Build amazing structures with LEGO and invent a compelling back story for the creation. Check
46. Understand that it is LEGO, not Lego, Legos, or Lego’s. Check
47. Build a two story house out of LEGO, in monochrome, with a balcony. Check, tuve muchos LEGO.
48. Construct a costume for you or your kid out of scraps, duct tape, paper mâché, and imagination. Nope
49. Be able to pick a lock. Nope
50. Determine the combination of a Master combination padlock in under 10 minutes. Nope
51. Assemble IKEA furniture without looking at the instructions. Bonus point if you don’t have to backtrack. Nope, al menos no de IKEA.
52. Use a digital SLR in full manual mode. Nope, sólo la analógica en modo manual, he.
53. Do cool things to Altoids tins. Nope
54. Be able to construct paper craft versions of space ships. Check
55. Origami! Bonus point for duct tape origami. (Ductigami) Check (single point)
56. Fix anything with duct tape, chewing gum and wire. Check
57. Knowing how to avoid being eaten by a grue. Nope. No vale el animal de Another World?
58. Know what a grue is. Nope
59. Understand where XYZZY came from, and have used it. Nope
60. Play any SNES game on your computer through an emulator. Check
61. Burn the rope. Nope
62. Know the Konami code, and where to use it. Nope
63. Whistle, hum, or play on an iPhone, the Cantina song. Nope
64. Learning to play the theme songs to the kids favorite TV shows. Nope
65. Solve a Rubik’s Cube. Check, sólo si vale despegar los colores.
66. Calculate THAC0. Nope
67. Know the difference between skills and traits. Check
68. Explain special relativity in terms an eight-year-old can grasp. Check, aunque aún no hizo falta.
69. Recite pi to 10 places or more. Nope, llego a 3.1415926.
70. Be able to calculate tip and split the check, all in your head. Check, mas un plus por haber hecho el cálculo.
71. Explain that the colours in a rainbow are roygbiv. Check
72. Understand the electromagnetic spectrum – xray, uv, visible, infrared, microwave, radio. Check
73. Know the difference between radiation and radioactive contamination. Check
74. Understand basic electronics components like resistors, capacitors, inductors and transistors. Check
75. Solder a circuit while bottle feeding an infant (lead free solder please). Nope, si lo intento quizás termine soldando un bebé y alimentando un circuito.
76. The meaning of technical acronyms. Check
77. The coffee dash, blindfolded (or blurry eyed). Coffee [cream] [sugar]. In under a minute. Check
78. Build a fighting robot. Nope
79. Program a fighting robot. Nope
80. Build a failsafe into a fighting robot so it doesn’t kill you. Sh*t! it’s coming after us!!
81. Be able to trace the Fellowship’s journey on a map of Middle Earth. Nope
82. Know all the names of the Dwarves in The Hobbit. Nope
83. Understand the difference between a comic book and a graphic novel. Check
84. Know where your towel is and why it is important. Check, towelie said it to me.
85. Re-enact the parrot sketch. Check, poor parrot.
86. Know the words to The Lumberjack Song. Check
87. Reciting key scenes from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Double check
88. Be able to recite at least one Geek Movie word for word. Nope
89. Know what the 8th Chevron does on a Stargate and how much power is required to get a lock. Nope
90. Be able to explain why it’s important that Han shot first. Check
91. Know why it is just wrong for Luke and Leia to kiss. Check, ajjjj…
92. Stop talking Star Wars long enough to get laid. Check, al menos una vez.
93. The ability to name actors, characters and plotlines from the majority of sci-fi movies produced since 1968. Check, pero defina bien mayoría.
94. Cite Mythbusters when debunking a myth or urban legend. Check
95. Sleep with a Cricket bat next to your bed. Nope
96. Have a documented plan on what to do during a zombie or robot uprising. Nope, está todo en mi cabeza.
97. Identify evil alternate universe versions of friends, family, co-workers or self. Nope
98. Be able to convince TSA that the electronic parts you are carrying are really not a threat to passengers. Nope
99. Talk about things that aren’t tech related. Check, religión y política, pero solo a veces.
100. Get something on the front page of Digg. Nope

En el mensaje de error en Epiphany:

Recuerda al clásico “Keyboard not found. Press any key to continue.”, no?

A veces dependemos demasiado de Google…

Al respecto de la controversia sobre el reciente benchmark entre Windows 7 y Ubuntu, este comentario en Slashdot se lleva los laureles:

by MyLongNickName on Thursday February 05, @03:14PM:
My unpatched Windows system can get rooted¹ AT LEAST ten times faster than Ubuntu. Take that, Open Source!

A la hora de explicar conceptos difíciles, las analogías pueden ser útiles.

… continuar leyendo …

De Zoitz, vía el azar. No viene mal un poco de humor para arrancar luego de las vacaciones.